Facilitators’ Corner: Calling on Individuals Without Making It Awkward

Achieving 100% Participation

One of the quiet goals of every Veterans Club meeting is simple: everyone talks. Not because we need long speeches or polished answers, but because relationships grow deeper when every voice in the room is heard. When members participate—especially the quieter ones—they move from “attending a meeting” to actually belonging to the group. And belonging is where hope grows, friendships take root, and lives begin to change.

But here’s the challenge:

Not everyone is naturally comfortable speaking during open discussion.

Some members are still warming up, still observing the group, or simply don’t want to interrupt. Some have never been asked their opinion in a way that felt safe. As a facilitator, your job is to gently help them step into the conversation without ever making them feel singled out or pressured.

This is where the facilitator’s craft really shines.

Prime the Pump — With Purpose and Respect

Calling on someone individually is not about putting them on the spot—it’s about valuing their perspective.  The trick is to make your prompt feel invited, not assigned.

A soft approach might sound like:

• “Mike, with your background as a firefighter, I bet you’ve seen this from a different angle. Would you be open to sharing a thought?”
• “Sarah, during introductions you mentioned 20 years in the Army. What you said made me think you might have some insight here… what’s your take?”
• “James, you worked in dispatch. I’m curious how this looks from your seat.”

When you connect your prompt to their service role or life experience, it helps them feel that their perspective isn’t just wanted—it’s needed.

That small shift makes all the difference.

Listen During Introductions — It’s Mission Critical

Your success during discussion depends heavily on how well you listened during introductions.

Every introduction gives you:

• A nugget of personal history
• A hint about their comfort level
• A clue about what they may offer
• A possible springboard for later discussion

If you want 100% participation, then your ears must be active long before the discussion begins.

Take mental (or actual) notes.

Who served where?
Who’s new?
Whose background connects naturally to today’s topic?

These details become the threads you gently pull during the conversation, weaving people into the discussion at just the right time.

Get to Know Everyone in the Room

Facilitation isn’t a spectator sport.  Before the meeting, during coffee, after the pledge—use every opportunity to learn something about the folks you’re serving.

Shake hands.

Ask where they served.
Ask what they’re doing now.
Learn their names—say their names.
Find out what lights them up.

These aren’t small gestures.  These are the building blocks of trust.

And trust is what gives a quieter member the courage to speak when you prompt them.

The Goal Is Connection, Not Compliance

We don’t call on people to “make them talk.”  We call on them because The Veterans Club is a place where their voice matters, their experience matters, and they matter.

When done well, a quieter member leaves the meeting feeling:

• Seen
• Valued
• Included
• Encouraged

That’s the kind of participation that strengthens relationships—and strengthens the mission.

Final Thought

As facilitator, you are the guide.  Your intentional listening, gentle nudges, and personal connections create the environment where every voice can be heard.

When everyone participates, the room changes.  It becomes more alive, more supportive, more connected…and ultimately, more capable of saving the very lives we’re here to protect.